Saturday, 6 April 2013 – The “shock” of being in an apartment is wearing off. At least, I hope it is. I don’t think I’ll ever stop being grateful, but I am feeling better oriented to the situation.
I’m going to keep mail going to General Delivery. I can just send address updates as mail comes in, then the mail going to General Delivery will stop on its own. And I’m getting over the giddiness of being able to leave my stuff in one place every day. That’s a bigger, more thrilling change, than I thought it would be.
I’ve been homeless before, but not like this. The last time was after my parents took everything I owned, but at least I had my van and a job. This time, I lost all my clients and have had to start over again. And losing my parents was nowhere near as big a loss as losing Yvette and the kids.
On a different note – a happier note – I stopped by Living Word Church tonight to say thank you to the volunteers there. I didn’t stay long, but it felt good to say thank you.
Truthfully, the PADS program is a hand out rather than a hand up. There are no strings attached, and there’s nothing in place to help you look for work or build yourself up. But the people who volunteer with PADS make a huge difference. Talking to them helped me feel normal, and encouraged me.
The volunteers were the first people I really spoke to about Getting Happy…when you wish you were dead. I told them about the book and what I wanted to do, and they encouraged me. They shared their own stories with me to help me see that the book is needed. That it really can help people. That my experiences, the empathy it has created in me, and the passion with which I speak are things people need to experience.
This is why I’m thankful for PADS and the volunteers. They helped me with the most basic of needs – and they’re still helping now. And they helped me put my thoughts in order for creating the Getting Happy book.